Thursday, July 9, 2009

Reflections on Proverbs 31


    Proverbs 31 (Contemporary English Version)

  1. These are the sayings that King Lemuel of Massa was taught by his mother.
  2. My son Lemuel, you were born in answer to my prayers, so listen carefully.
  3. Don't waste your life chasing after women! This has ruined many kings.
  4. Kings and leaders should not get drunk or even want to drink.
  5. Drinking makes you forget your responsibilities, and you mistreat the poor.
  6. Beer and wine are only for the dying or for those who have lost all hope.
  7. Let them drink and forget how poor and miserable they feel.
  8. But you must defend those who are helpless and have no hope.
  9. Be fair and give justice to the poor and homeless.
  10. A truly good wife is the most precious treasure a man can find!
  11. Her husband depends on her, and she never lets him down.
  12. She is good to him every day of her life,
  13. and with her own hands she gladly makes clothes.
  14. She is like a sailing ship that brings food from across the sea.
  15. She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants.
  16. She knows how to buy land and how to plant a vineyard,
  17. and she always works hard.
  18. She knows when to buy or sell, and she stays busy until late at night.
  19. She spins her own cloth,
  20. and she helps the poor and the needy.
  21. Her family has warm clothing, and so she doesn't worry when it snows.
  22. She does her own sewing, and everything she wears is beautiful.
  23. Her husband is a well-known and respected leader in the city.
  24. She makes clothes to sell to the shop owners.
  25. She is strong and graceful, as well as cheerful about the future.
  26. Her words are sensible, and her advice is thoughtful.
  27. She takes good care of her family and is never lazy.
  28. Her children praise her, and with great pride her husband says,
  29. "There are many good women, but you are the best!"
  30. Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the LORD deserves to be praised.
  31. Show her respect-- praise her in public for what she has done.

This concluding chapter of Proverbs, as with the previous chapter is an appendix to the book. It is unusual on two counts. It is instruction given by a mother instead of a father, and it extols the virtues of a noble wife in contrast to the teaching of Proverbs against the dangers of non-virtuous women such as the adulteress or prostitute. Some bible translations refer to it as an oracle, which means a weighty message. Older translations call it a prophecy, but oracle is more appropriate.

Though the son to whom the instruction is given was a king, most of it is fitting for a man of any position. Only the first few verses relate specifically to a king, but even these could be applied in principle to any man. They are just four things:
  • Don't spend energy on women or things that destroy. This does not speak of evil or non-virtuous women, just women. I imagine it is a reference to the practice of a kingly harem. It is a practice that has been referred to as the curse of Eastern kingdoms. This practice would certainly expend much of a king's energy and attention. The rest of verse 3 which says, "or things that destroy kings," suggests the mother considered this practice to be destructive.
  • Don't get drunk. Getting drunk is not wise for kings for it will cause them to forget their edicts and pervert justice. This mother considered it important for a king to be just.
  • Speak up for those who have no voice. Provide justice of all who are dispossessed.
  • Judge righteously. Judge righteously, and defend the cause of the oppressed and needy.
Following these brief instructions, the mother moves on to the subject of finding a capable wife, and proceeds to describe a woman any man would want to have as his wife. It is a description that leaves us wondering if any such woman ever existed, but keep in mind, this description comes not from a man, but from a woman. Rather than list all that this woman does, let's give attention to the basic virtues she possesses.
  • She is trustworthy, rewarding her husband with good and not evil.
  • She is creative, weaving and sewing enthusiastically.
  • She is reliable in providing adequately for her family, giving them good and interesting foods and being sure they are well clothed in all seasons. She even makes the cloth for their clothing.
  • She is industrious, buying a field and planting a vineyard.
  • She is caring and helps the poor and needy.
  • She is wise, capable of speaking with wisdom.
Because of the virtues of this wife, the husband has a good reputation among the other men. The mother concludes her description of the capable wife by pointing out that charm and beauty are not the best attributes on which to choose a wife. Charm can be deceptive and beauty is fleeting. She also points out that if her son finds such a capable wife, he should appreciate her by rewarding her and giving her praise.

As a personal aside, I might add that I found such a wife, or I should say that God provided her. I was too young and ignorant to have made such a find on my own. So I praise God for her, and have now enjoyed 45 years of marriage with her. Many have lost faith in the institution of marriage with so many that have failed. They wonder if marriage with one person for a lifetime is even possible anymore. But it is not marriage that is failing, it is people who are failing. Most importantly they are failing to approach marriage with the seriousness it deserves, selecting mates based on superficial and insignificant qualities and leaving God out of it altogether. Many are "religious," but give little thought to seeking God's help in choosing a marriage mate. From there, it goes downhill. A good, and lifelong marriage is still possible, we just have to seek God's help in the beginning and throughout.

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